Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to understand, manage, and use emotions effectively—both our own and those of others. It's about being aware of emotions, recognizing how they affect our behavior and decisions, and using this awareness to manage relationships in healthy ways. EI involves skills like empathy, self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, and social skills.
The concept of emotional intelligence became widely popular through psychologist Daniel Goleman's work in the 1990s, though the idea itself has roots in earlier research on social intelligence. Goleman proposed that, contrary to the belief that success is purely based on cognitive intelligence (IQ), EI plays a critical role in personal and professional success.
How does emotional intelligence work?
Emotions impact thoughts and actions, so Emotional
Intelligence (EI) aims to help you understand how they develop and the best way
to manage them.
There are six moments in the emotional process:
- Moment 1: The stimulus or event
This occurs when an event triggers an emotion. Let’s say you
receive a last-minute task when you’re ready to leave. This activates an
emotional reaction.
- Moment 2: A basic emotion arises
As a result of this stimulus or event, an emotion arises
naturally and quickly. It could be anger, surprise, or something else
manifesting intensely and unavoidably. You feel frustration or anger instantly,
as the event—receiving the last-minute task—is beyond your control. The emotion
appears naturally and is intense.
- Moment 3: Thought is involved
Next, logic also comes into play, generating a conclusion.
This mental activity produces a new stimulus that leads to a second basic
emotion. You begin to analyze the situation logically, considering the reasons
behind the urgency of the task. This helps reduce the intensity of anger and
brings up a second emotion, like responsibility or empathy.
- Moment 4: Actions are taken
All emotions are meant to mobilize us into action, and our
brain is there to help us shape them. Feeding the emotion can lead to acting
irrationally. Instead, if you think positively, focus on solutions, and open
yourself to new possibilities. Rather than acting impulsively (like refusing to
do the task or doing it with a bad attitude), you choose to use self-regulation
and focus on solutions. You might think about how to organize yourself to
finish quickly or ask for support if possible.
- Moment 5: Results are reaped
Depending on how you regulate your emotions and mental
activity, certain outcomes can occur. Thanks to emotional regulation, you
manage to complete the task without conflict and maintain a positive attitude.
This can lead to a better relationship with your boss and colleagues and leave
you feeling satisfied with your behavior.
- Moment 6: Beliefs are formed
Beliefs can be positive or negative, as they are ideas, we
have about ourselves. When negative, they hinder our path toward our goals, but
when positive or neutral, they support our life objectives. By handling the
situation positively, you reinforce a constructive belief about yourself, like,
“I can handle pressure effectively” or “I am capable of adapting in difficult
situations.” This belief contributes to your self-confidence and future
success.
Importance of emotional intelligence
According to Bradberry and Greaves, due to the structure of
the human brain, a person’s first reaction to any event is emotional, as it is
a natural biological response. However, not everyone is able to accurately
identify their own emotions. But this can be improved.
Emotions are fundamental in human life, as they not only
affect attention but also modify certain response behaviors and memory.
Therefore, recognizing emotions allows people to learn how to channel them more
effectively and connect more easily with others.
By managing emotions, it is possible to verbalize these
mental states by assigning names to identify them as feelings, transforming
them from primitive reactions into responses that help face daily .life in a
better way
Additionally, high emotional intelligence promotes
self-awareness, helping to build strong relationships, make good decisions, and
cope with difficult situations. It also increases the sense of well-being by
enabling better decision-making.
Thus, people with a high degree of self-awareness know and
are confident about what they do well, what motivates and satisfies them, as
well as the people and situations that cause them to lose control.
Components of Emotional Intelligence (EI)
Self-Awareness: This is the ability to recognize and
understand your own emotions, strengths, weaknesses, and motivations. A person
with high self-awareness can recognize how their feelings affect their thoughts
and behaviors, which helps them respond more thoughtfully to situations. For
example, if you're feeling anxious, you can identify that emotion, understand
its source, and avoid reacting impulsively. Tips to improve self-awareness
include keeping a journal of your emotions and actively seeking feedback from
others.
Self-Regulation: This involves managing one’s emotions in a
healthy way. It’s about controlling impulsive reactions, thinking before
acting, and being able to handle situations calmly. People who excel at
self-regulation tend to be more adaptable, resilient, and comfortable with
change. For example, if a team project hits a setback, a self-regulated person
will approach the issue with a calm and constructive attitude rather than panic
or frustration. Practices to boost self-regulation include mindfulness exercises,
such as deep breathing or meditation, which help maintain emotional control.
Motivation: Motivation within EI is about having a drive to
improve and achieve goals for personal satisfaction, rather than for external
rewards. Highly motivated individuals are often resilient, focused on achieving
long-term success, and show a strong commitment to their work. For instance, a
motivated individual in a team setting will push through challenges with
optimism and perseverance, inspiring others along the way. Goal-setting
techniques, such as creating SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant,
Time-Bound) goals, can enhance this component.
Empathy: Empathy is the ability to understand and feel the
emotions of others. It goes beyond just sympathizing with someone—it’s about
genuinely feeling what they’re going through. Empathetic individuals are
skilled at managing relationships and understanding the needs of their
colleagues or clients, making them highly effective in teamwork and leadership
roles. Developing empathy often involves active listening, which means focusing
fully on the speaker without planning your own response as they speak.
Social Skills: This component encompasses a wide range of
interpersonal skills, such as communication, conflict resolution, and teamwork.
Those with strong social skills can effectively lead and work with others by
fostering a sense of connection and cooperation. They are adept at managing
both personal and professional relationships, ensuring they are supportive and
collaborative. Social skills can be honed through group activities, public
speaking exercises, and practicing clear, open communication.
Differences Between Emotional Intelligence and Leadership
Emotional intelligence and leadership are closely linked,
but they’re not the same. Here’s a breakdown of what sets them apart:
Scope:
Emotional intelligence is the skill of managing one's
emotions and understanding others, while
leadership is the art of inspiring and
guiding others toward a shared objective. Leaders need EI to succeed, but EI
doesn’t make one a leader.
Core Skills:
Emotional intelligence focuses on emotional
awareness, self-regulation, and empathy. Leadership, on the other hand,
requires additional skills like vision, strategic thinking, and decision-making
that may or may not involve EI. Leaders often need to make tough choices and
take calculated risks, sometimes without unanimous support, which requires
courage, strategic insight, and strong reasoning abilities.
Impact:
While emotional intelligence is an asset in any
role, leadership directly impacts organizational goals, growth, and culture.
Leaders with high EI tend to build positive cultures, but leadership also
demands accountability for results, guiding a team through setbacks, and
steering the team toward innovation and productivity.
How does emotional intelligence work in organizations?
Emotional intelligence in the workplace is about
understanding and managing emotions to improve interactions, teamwork, and
overall productivity. People with high emotional intelligence know their own
strengths and weaknesses, stay calm under pressure, and adapt well to changes.
They’re also tuned into others' emotions, which helps with empathy, clear
communication, and conflict resolution. Leaders with emotional intelligence create a positive
culture, where employees feel valued and safe to share ideas. This leads to
stronger relationships, better decision-making, and a resilient team that’s
ready to face challenges and adapt to change. In short, emotional intelligence
helps build a happier, more effective workplace.
As we conclude this journey through the importance of emotional intelligence in our lives, we want to highlight how these skills can transform our relationships and our environment. We firmly believe that by developing our emotional intelligence, we not only improve our communication and empathy but also become more resilient in the face of challenges.
For those interested in delving deeper into this topic, we would like to present some organizations that are leading the way in the development of emotional intelligence:
We encourage you to explore the work of these institutions and consider how they can contribute to your personal and professional growth. We would love to hear your thoughts and opinions in the comments!
"In a very real sense we have two minds, one that thinks and one that feels."
— Daniel Goleman