MR. Picman and the Emotional Intelligence

Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to understand, manage, and use emotions effectively—both our own and those of others. It's about being aware of emotions, recognizing how they affect our behavior and decisions, and using this awareness to manage relationships in healthy ways. EI involves skills like empathy, self-awareness, self-regulation, motivation, and social skills.

Introduction to Emotional Intelligence

The concept of emotional intelligence became widely popular through psychologist Daniel Goleman's work in the 1990s, though the idea itself has roots in earlier research on social intelligence. Goleman proposed that, contrary to the belief that success is purely based on cognitive intelligence (IQ), EI plays a critical role in personal and professional success.

How does emotional intelligence work?

Emotions impact thoughts and actions, so Emotional Intelligence (EI) aims to help you understand how they develop and the best way to manage them.

There are six moments in the emotional process:

• Moment 1: The stimulus or event

This occurs when an event triggers an emotion. Let’s say you receive a last-minute task when you’re ready to leave. This activates an emotional reaction.

• Moment 2: A basic emotion arises

As a result of this stimulus or event, an emotion arises naturally and quickly. It could be anger, surprise, or something else manifesting intensely and unavoidably. You feel frustration or anger instantly, as the event—receiving the last-minute task—is beyond your control. The emotion appears naturally and is intense.

• Moment 3: Thought is involved

Next, logic also comes into play, generating a conclusion. This mental activity produces a new stimulus that leads to a second basic emotion. You begin to analyze the situation logically, considering the reasons behind the urgency of the task. This helps reduce the intensity of anger and brings up a second emotion, like responsibility or empathy.

• Moment 4: Actions are taken

All emotions are meant to mobilize us into action, and our brain is there to help us shape them. Feeding the emotion can lead to acting irrationally. Instead, if you think positively, focus on solutions, and open yourself to new possibilities. Rather than acting impulsively (like refusing to do the task or doing it with a bad attitude), you choose to use self-regulation and focus on solutions. You might think about how to organize yourself to finish quickly or ask for support if possible.

• Moment 5: Results are reaped

Depending on how you regulate your emotions and mental activity, certain outcomes can occur. Thanks to emotional regulation, you manage to complete the task without conflict and maintain a positive attitude. This can lead to a better relationship with your boss and colleagues and leave you feeling satisfied with your behavior.

• Moment 6: Beliefs are formed

Beliefs can be positive or negative, as they are ideas, we have about ourselves. When negative, they hinder our path toward our goals, but when positive or neutral, they support our life objectives. By handling the situation positively, you reinforce a constructive belief about yourself, like, “I can handle pressure effectively” or “I am capable of adapting in difficult situations.” This belief contributes to your self-confidence and future success.

Importance of emotional intelligence

According to Bradberry and Greaves, due to the structure of the human brain, a person’s first reaction to any event is emotional, as it is a natural biological response. However, not everyone is able to accurately identify their own emotions. But this can be improved.

Emotions are fundamental in human life, as they not only affect attention but also modify certain response behaviors and memory. Therefore, recognizing emotions allows people to learn how to channel them more effectively and connect more easily with others.

By managing emotions, it is possible to verbalize these mental states by assigning names to identify them as feelings, transforming them from primitive reactions into responses that help face daily .life in a better way

Additionally, high emotional intelligence promotes self-awareness, helping to build strong relationships, make good decisions, and cope with difficult situations. It also increases the sense of well-being by enabling better decision-making.

Thus, people with a high degree of self-awareness know and are confident about what they do well, what motivates and satisfies them, as well as the people and situations that cause them to lose control. 

Components of Emotional Intelligence (EI)

Self-Awareness: This is the ability to recognize and understand your own emotions, strengths, weaknesses, and motivations. A person with high self-awareness can recognize how their feelings affect their thoughts and behaviors, which helps them respond more thoughtfully to situations. For example, if you're feeling anxious, you can identify that emotion, understand its source, and avoid reacting impulsively. Tips to improve self-awareness include keeping a journal of your emotions and actively seeking feedback from others.

Self-Regulation: This involves managing one’s emotions in a healthy way. It’s about controlling impulsive reactions, thinking before acting, and being able to handle situations calmly. People who excel at self-regulation tend to be more adaptable, resilient, and comfortable with change. For example, if a team project hits a setback, a self-regulated person will approach the issue with a calm and constructive attitude rather than panic or frustration. Practices to boost self-regulation include mindfulness exercises, such as deep breathing or meditation, which help maintain emotional control.

Motivation: Motivation within EI is about having a drive to improve and achieve goals for personal satisfaction, rather than for external rewards. Highly motivated individuals are often resilient, focused on achieving long-term success, and show a strong commitment to their work. For instance, a motivated individual in a team setting will push through challenges with optimism and perseverance, inspiring others along the way. Goal-setting techniques, such as creating SMART (Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-Bound) goals, can enhance this component.

Empathy: Empathy is the ability to understand and feel the emotions of others. It goes beyond just sympathizing with someone—it’s about genuinely feeling what they’re going through. Empathetic individuals are skilled at managing relationships and understanding the needs of their colleagues or clients, making them highly effective in teamwork and leadership roles. Developing empathy often involves active listening, which means focusing fully on the speaker without planning your own response as they speak.

Social Skills: This component encompasses a wide range of interpersonal skills, such as communication, conflict resolution, and teamwork. Those with strong social skills can effectively lead and work with others by fostering a sense of connection and cooperation. They are adept at managing both personal and professional relationships, ensuring they are supportive and collaborative. Social skills can be honed through group activities, public speaking exercises, and practicing clear, open communication.